Hi everyone I'm back home, after a super long day. I was up around 8+9, to shower, yada yada, to go for an early mother's day dinner with my grandma. Followed by admin in church before service, service, meeting with Jian Ming, meeting with Roy, followed back to back, with a meeting with fifi and Garrett for Pastor Kong's seminar, and followed by a runthrough, well more like many run throughs.

Wow, God is truly accelerating me. More than that, what I want to talk about is what went on during service.

I had been using my strengths too much, making alot of it my pride. I've not been calling out to God, not using his strengths. However, as they sang alleluia to Christ the Lord during service, the presence of God came, and He told me this, stop thinking about everyone around you, and worship me. For since very long, I worshiped. This feeling like never before. wow! and we had an alter call, where Pastor prayed for the leaders, and soon to be leaders. I hesitated. yes, I did. I hesitated, wondering if I was ready, and God spoke saying, if you want to be a leader, why are you still standing here? So , here goes. As pastor Lia prayed over me, all she said was, "Preach! you are going to preach! PREACH!![prodded me in the stomach and yelled] LOVE! PREACH!" as we sang hallelujah, there were no tears. none whatsoever. but as soon as she touched my forehead, I felt all weight leave me. There was no weight, not meaning the kind where you have weight on shoulders, but literally, there was no mass in me. I felt myself, falling against pastor's arm around me, yet I couldn't feel myself. There was nothing in me. I just had a revelation, it says that everything of mine, God can take away. WOW! well, as she touched me, tears came thick and fast. as I fell, I felt ushers catching me, yes, yet there was no feeling in me, all I know was I was sobbing, and crying. For the first time since long when I got prayed for by Pastor Lia, I truly, 100% fell under the presence of God, I have been washed and cleansed. PREACH! LOVE!!!

preach? I never saw myself there before. and as I was talking to Roy after that, he shared about his life, and as he shared, it made me see mine, of whether I was heading in the right direction? well, he did say, not to give up my dreams of working with special children, but to instead looking at it in an overseas perspective, would I ever consider working in church, with special children who might in turn also come to church in the future? I never looked at it from that angle before, and after he said that, things showed a clearer picture. God is indeed changing and accelerating me, from being a nobody since young, I am someone now.

Even at home, where I was always no body, treated wrongly, Eric helped me see, that hey, God still loves you, and that even if I cant do something at home, I can do something for God. Leonard helped me see, that there was someone deep down inside, worthy of something. Roy showed me that, no matter how busy the leaders are, their first main concern is about people. Thank you for showing me all this love and care.

I love my God, I will rise up in usher, and I will be someone of worth.

Thank you leaders! =]